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Dear Gear, I’ve been a confident skier, mountain biker, and climber for over three decades. I’m also a woman. For some reason, most of the guys in my life seem to think it’s OK to mansplain how to use my gear to me, and it makes me want to scream. What’s the best way to handle this situation so I don’t blow a gasket? —Frustrated Feminist
Dear Frustrated,
First of all, do you know what blowing a gasket actually means? I’d be happy to explain it to you—I’m kidding! All of us gals have been in your shoes at one time or another. And while the outdoors are far less biased than they used to be, there’s work to be done when it comes to educating menfolk on how not to “educate” women. Unfortunately, as I’ve discovered, an explosive, curse-filled rant isn’t the most effective route to enlightenment (although it’s plenty cathartic). Usually, the dude just ends up getting defensive. For me, two strategies have brought the most success.
Option one: Play dumb. Now, your first reaction might be, “Isn’t that exactly what the mansplainer wants me to do?” But I’m talking so dumb that you cause utter confusion, until the mansplainer finally sees how ridiculous he’s being. For example, if a man were to tell me, a ski-gear editor, that the skis I’m on are known for being playful, I’d ask, “What does that mean?” And when he says something like “There’s a lot of rocker in them, so it’s easier to ski switch and jib around the mountain,” I’d respond with “What’s switch?” And so on. It’s super fun; you get to pretend you’re a two-year-old for a few minutes! But fear not: with practice, your reward will be an extremely docile lift partner with a better understanding of the value of unsolicited advice.
Option two: Call him out, Rebecca Solnit style. Before the term mansplaining was even born, the writer-activist’s famous 2014 essay, “Men Explain Things to Me,” offered several examples of “Mr. Important” men narrating her area of expertise back to her (in one case even referencing a book he didn’t realize she’d written). “Dude, if you’re reading this, you’re a carbuncle on the face of humanity and an obstacle to civilization. Feel the shame,” she wrote about another man. Next time you’re getting mansplained to on the chairlift or at the crag, tell him he’s being a carbuncle, and let me know how it goes.
No matter which route you choose, the key is to address their arrogance posthaste. Because once you let a few patronizing micro-mansplains slide, that’s when the fury builds. And once the vitriol comes to a boil, that explosive, curse-filled rant is likely to follow. Although, if you truly can’t hold it in any longer, it might be exactly what the mansplainer needs, goddammit!
Have a question of your own? Send it to us at [email protected].
The post What’s the Best Way to Deal with Gear Mansplaining? appeared first on Outside Online.
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