Hoping to understand my dad

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My dad is a high ranking army officer who has spent most of his career in infantry. Since 9/11 I would say he’s been deployed about 50% of the time, sometimes doing multiple years at once, sometimes 3-4 tours in one year. He’s been basically everywhere, including places he’s very vague about for obvious reasons. He never talks about his work with us because we’re all girls and I think he wants to compartmentalize his life as much as possible. But I can tell that the last 20 years have weighed on him a LOT — I see it in the way he uses substances, the short fuse he has, and the general tension he has around the house and family. I grew up and chose a very different life where I don’t interact with the military much at all. Recently I was watching a show and I asked my husband “do you think he’s carried a dead body?” And he said “I’m sure he has.” Which got me wondering if you all here, who have worked in this career, could give me a sense of the shit he’s seen over the last 20 years. I know he has killed many people via drone strikes, but should I assume he has also killed by hand? By gun? I’m just trying to understand the types of things that could be haunting him because he will not share them with us at all.

submitted by /u/No_Spray_2279
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