U
/u/Empty-Temperature943
I recently lost a cat that was very dear to me. I have 3 cats at home who have become my family. But the cat in question is not one of them.
I took care of a little ginger cat under my office building ever since he was a few weeks old, he had two siblings who stopped showing up but he stayed.
I wanted to take him home, but everyone kept saying he was happy in the outdoors. Our office building has a big parking space and a garden next to it, so he was hanging out there all day playing. It felt wrong to put him in a closed apartment.
So instead, I made him a little box out of a cooler box, he had a carpet and everything for when it was cold. He had food and water bowls, he was fed three times a day and sometimes more, and was being pampered by everyone at the office, not just me.
A few days ago, he showed up with a broken leg. I waited a day to see if it would improve on its own but it didn't. So I took him to the vet, they X-rayed him and then plastered it.
I started contacting known rescuers I know to try and find him a foster home just until he recovers. But no one answered. I live in a country where we don't have governmental shelters, all shelters are individual initiatives and the amount of cases they receive is huge so they don't answer to all cases. Having failed, I took him back to the office and kept the cage for him to curl up in, but he chose to sleep outside of it. I talked to the security guys and told them to keep an eye on him until I find him a home.
The little cat woke up scared, disoriented, and not understanding what was on his leg. He kept walking and tripping. I caught him again and sat him on my lap until he fell asleep again.
After I left, the guys told me he was nowhere in sight. I drove back to the office at night trying to find him but we couldn't. But he showed up again after an hour. I asked the guys to keep him in for the night, and I will figure it out in the morning. I thought of taking him into my office and keeping him there for a few days. I went and bought a litter box and food.
The following day, I was told that they let him out at night, they didn't keep him in and he hasn't shown up again. All day, there was no sight of him.
I came back the same night, with some wet food hoping it would attract him back again but he never showed up.
The following morning I went looking again, thinking he might have gone to other buildings nearby. I ended up finding him dead under a tree in a parking space.
The sight of him killed me. His lifeless body lay there with his little plastered paw raised to the sky. He looked so helpless.
I don't know what happened, I don't know if it was a complication after the anesthesia. Or if he was scared to death because there are dogs that roam around at night. He has no sign of injuries, no bite marks nothing. He just laid there flat on his back lifeless.
I feel an enormous guilt. I could have done more. I could have talked to more people to take him in. I relied too much on his instinct of survival just for one night until I figured it out. I relied on people who didn't keep him in. I feel like I failed him miserably.
Everyone around me is telling me that I did the best I could. But I think that's just isn't right. If I did the best I could he would have still been alive. I don't want people telling me that because I know I didn't do the best I could. I could have thought of keeping him in my office earlier. I could have tried finding a solution for him before taking him to the vet.
I hate it when people pat others on the back trying to remove their guilt with phrases like "You did the best you could". If the best I could, caused him to die then how is "best" at all?
He was my happy moments at work, when I arrived and whistled, he'd come running, purring and cuddling, and he'd sit on my lap during coffee breaks. He was a bundle of joy that I failed miserably.
I am not posting this looking for sympathy, I just needed to lay it all out and let it out of my system, and maybe I need to hear the truth instead of a pat on the back. I need someone to tell me that I was irresponsible, and that I could have done more.
submitted by /u/Empty-Temperature943
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Continue reading...
I took care of a little ginger cat under my office building ever since he was a few weeks old, he had two siblings who stopped showing up but he stayed.
I wanted to take him home, but everyone kept saying he was happy in the outdoors. Our office building has a big parking space and a garden next to it, so he was hanging out there all day playing. It felt wrong to put him in a closed apartment.
So instead, I made him a little box out of a cooler box, he had a carpet and everything for when it was cold. He had food and water bowls, he was fed three times a day and sometimes more, and was being pampered by everyone at the office, not just me.
A few days ago, he showed up with a broken leg. I waited a day to see if it would improve on its own but it didn't. So I took him to the vet, they X-rayed him and then plastered it.
I started contacting known rescuers I know to try and find him a foster home just until he recovers. But no one answered. I live in a country where we don't have governmental shelters, all shelters are individual initiatives and the amount of cases they receive is huge so they don't answer to all cases. Having failed, I took him back to the office and kept the cage for him to curl up in, but he chose to sleep outside of it. I talked to the security guys and told them to keep an eye on him until I find him a home.
The little cat woke up scared, disoriented, and not understanding what was on his leg. He kept walking and tripping. I caught him again and sat him on my lap until he fell asleep again.
After I left, the guys told me he was nowhere in sight. I drove back to the office at night trying to find him but we couldn't. But he showed up again after an hour. I asked the guys to keep him in for the night, and I will figure it out in the morning. I thought of taking him into my office and keeping him there for a few days. I went and bought a litter box and food.
The following day, I was told that they let him out at night, they didn't keep him in and he hasn't shown up again. All day, there was no sight of him.
I came back the same night, with some wet food hoping it would attract him back again but he never showed up.
The following morning I went looking again, thinking he might have gone to other buildings nearby. I ended up finding him dead under a tree in a parking space.
The sight of him killed me. His lifeless body lay there with his little plastered paw raised to the sky. He looked so helpless.
I don't know what happened, I don't know if it was a complication after the anesthesia. Or if he was scared to death because there are dogs that roam around at night. He has no sign of injuries, no bite marks nothing. He just laid there flat on his back lifeless.
I feel an enormous guilt. I could have done more. I could have talked to more people to take him in. I relied too much on his instinct of survival just for one night until I figured it out. I relied on people who didn't keep him in. I feel like I failed him miserably.
Everyone around me is telling me that I did the best I could. But I think that's just isn't right. If I did the best I could he would have still been alive. I don't want people telling me that because I know I didn't do the best I could. I could have thought of keeping him in my office earlier. I could have tried finding a solution for him before taking him to the vet.
I hate it when people pat others on the back trying to remove their guilt with phrases like "You did the best you could". If the best I could, caused him to die then how is "best" at all?
He was my happy moments at work, when I arrived and whistled, he'd come running, purring and cuddling, and he'd sit on my lap during coffee breaks. He was a bundle of joy that I failed miserably.
I am not posting this looking for sympathy, I just needed to lay it all out and let it out of my system, and maybe I need to hear the truth instead of a pat on the back. I need someone to tell me that I was irresponsible, and that I could have done more.
submitted by /u/Empty-Temperature943
[link] [comments]
Continue reading...
